Tuesday, April 15, 2008

The Circus is Packing Up

Much as I hate the act of moving (from house to house that is) Gary and I have decided to resettle once our lease is up at the end of May. Having moved twice since December of 2006, I've come to the conclusion that I'd rather have my wisdom teeth removed through my nostrils. But we discussed it and while we live in a great house now, we really need to pair down. Since mom is gone, this place is entirely too big for us. There is something kinda sad about waking up every morning and looking out of my bedroom into hers and seeing an empty bed. I absolutely refuse to close the doors; I would rather look into her room and feel a pinch of sadness than close off the memory all together.

We have no intention of leaving North Beach. Despite not being able to truly enjoy all this little 'burg has to offer over the past year, we've completely fallen in love with the place. For those who haven't been to 'Casa del Fuego' it is a great beach house built about 10 years ago, 2 rows off the water, a wonderful covered porch, hot tub, blah, blah, blah. But we've found a funky little beach bungalow build in 1928, right on the water, stunning views from the living and dining room, screened porch, excruciatingly small bedrooms (3 of them) and two, uh, really funky bathrooms (or were those closets?) And we plan to paint each one in funky beach colors. Can you say 'South Beach?'

After spending a year dealing with 'adult' problems, Gar and I need a year off. We need to have a little carefree adolescent time. This past year has been wrought with hardship, change and enormous growth. While I'd give anything to have mom back with us, I relish the growth that her illness and passing (along with my own cancer) have forced me to experience. I've learned more about myself over that time than in any other period of my life.
Now Gary and I need a year of rest to let those seeds sow.

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